How Fitness Helped Me Build the Confidence to Put My Words Out There

What do you think is holding you back from doing what you said you were going to do? 

What’s holding you back from the life you swore to your family and friends that you were going to stop at nothing to achieve? 

I bet you it’s you. Now I know you’re probably going to say oh well I’m just worried about posting on IG or X because I have people I know on there. Hot take — I’ll say it again, the problem is you, not them.

Avoiding the Work, Means Avoiding the Confidence Required for Your Goals

Hear me out, I’ve been where you’re at, hell I’m still fighting to stay out of that headspace at times. I say the problem isn’t the people around you, it’s that you care more about the opinions of others, than doing what you said you were going to do. 

Competence builds confidence. If you’re not competent at something worth being confident about, how can you expect to believe in yourself enough to reach your goals?

Let’s go back to my last blog if you haven’t read it already, but discipline is a big part of this whole building skills thing. If you aren’t able to hold yourself to the small, simple daily tasks you’ve set for yourself, then you’ve got to start there. This is where fitness played a big role in my journey—learning to follow through and stick with something, even when it sucks.

Build respect for yourself by doing what you said you were going to do, then you can start to have confidence in yourself by being competent enough to follow through.

Fitness Changed Everything For Me

The first time I ever stepped in a gym, I was working out in gym class in high school, and thankfully my wrestling coach was my P.E. teacher. He walked me through some of the basics, but I was always on the smaller side, so I couldn’t lift anywhere near what some of the older and bigger guys could. From there on out I wanted to get like them and be able to be “one of the guys” and have gym bros.

Fast forward a few years later, on and off taking a few months working out, then pausing or swapping programs, I didn’t make much noticeable gains to write home about. The problem wasn’t the program, the diet, or the people on YouTube I subscribed to giving me the wrong information, the problem was me. 

I was the one who didn’t stick with a program or my diet. There were days I just winged it and went to the gym and followed one program for a few days, then I’d read an article or a post on Reddit about someone who made crazy gains following a different program, so I would swap to that. 

In a moment of reflection I realized something. I had built a lack of self-respect and broke down my self-confidence simply because I kept breaking promises to myself and shifted the blame onto other people, so in the moment it would feel easier somehow, so I committed myself that I would follow the plan and that if I didn’t follow through it was my fault I wouldn’t reach my goals and no one elses.

Writing 101 — No One Cares in the Beginning and That’s Great News

I’ve dabbled in writing for years, whether it was poetry in school because I couldn’t express myself to save my life verbally, so I wrote down how I felt and ended up with some spoken word-esque pieces, or practicing copywriting. I couldn’t even comment on LinkedIn posts without having a coniption about who might say something.

The greatest thing I’ve read was that in the beginning, no one cares and no one is really paying attention to you. This meant I could put in the countless reps, and get all the practice in the world to master skills all in the dark. Once I accepted that I could fail, get knocked down and get back up, and keep working towards my goals with nothing holding me back.

Blinders on, head down, focused and remembering everyday, when I don’t want to write, write anyways. Keep writing because no one is watching, and the time I spend writing now I can do in peace and build the skills I need to build the life I want to live. If I don’t do this, especially now when no one cares, then I’ll be the one who cares and I’ll always live a life of “what ifs” or looking back “ I could’ve been great if I had just tried long enough”.

Take a good look at your life, and the reasons you say you haven’t achieved your goals, own the real reasons and get to work — no matter if it’s in fitness, writing or another goal.

“You don’t become confident by shouting affirmations in the mirror, but by having a stack of undeniable proof that you are who you say you are. Outwork your self doubt.” Alex Hormozi